Continues from Part One. . . .
The last time I wrote about this subject, I said I would continue later. . . This is the continuation of Part One.
If you want a marriage that works, you should carefully consider the following issues:
Condemnation by Scriptures
It is common among Christian families that when there is a disagreement, each party would be defending their actions with Scriptures. Both the offender and the offended would find defense for themselves on the pages of the Bible. When one opts to speak out in correction of the other’s wrongdoing, instead of examining the matter on its merit, the other party is quick to bring out the wrongdoings of the one raising the correction! Each one fails to make amend because of the other party’s faults, and the cycle goes on and on. Soon , too many wrong doing would be left unattended and it would seem like the other person’s weaknesses is a licence to continue in wrongdoing.
This is a strategy of the enemy to take he attention of both couple away from the Truth and focus it on wrongdoings. Nothing wears out couple in marriage than the bickering and fighting that comes from persistent wrongdoing.
‘My Thing, Your Thing, Our Thing’
Resources (time, money and people) has become a very powerful force in most marriages. Unfortunately, unsaved people seem to expect less in this area and they seem to go along well. Like I said earlier, in the first post, if we really want to practice marriage according to the word of God, we would have to roll back many of the things we have come to see as development or progress.
Husbands wants their wives to work because they want her to contribute to providing for the house. Still they want her to look after the home, a duty assigned her by God and culture. Somehow, women are either becoming ‘superstars’ or ‘superfailures’ because combining all these is not God’s original design.
Wives want their husbands to provide for the house in all areas, leaving no area untouched! They want holidays, high-street fashion, children’s education, magnificent houses, fantastic bank account and fabulous life; but he is not caring, helpful and romantic if he cannot help with the dishes or be there for children’s recital. If he keeps forgetting dates and he is too tired to do well in the ‘other room’, how then is he a loving husband!?. If he is available to do all these chores and unable to provide enough, the woman’s money becomes hers and his money is his . . . it is important that everyone understands who pays the bills.
For as long as these we keep looking for ‘balance’ that does not exist, we want to eat our cakes and have it, we should just describe marriages as marriage, not Christian marriage. There is nothing Christian in how we prefer to play our roles in marriages these days. God cannot be mocked. His word will not fail.
If we want truly desire the peace that God’s presence can bring to our marriages, we must be ready to do it God’s way. Peace to you.